It’s Not You, It’s me: The Problem With Monogamy On Your Job Search

Posted 6 years ago •

Congratulations! You’ve been offered a job. But hold on… you have another interview lined up for a role you prefer. Do you turn down the job you’ve been offered and hope the preferred company wants to hire you immediately? Or stay loyal to your current offer? Maybe you have three offers all at once and aren’t sure which one to commit to. Staying monogamous to one offer throughout your job search can be tough, especially when a more attractive offer comes along. So what’s the best thing to do? 

I’ve been offered a job but still have other interviews to attend. What do I do?

Don’t worry – you aren’t cheating on any employers if you still attend other interviews. All you need to do is negotiate some time to decide on a plan of action.

  • Acknowledge the offer – blanking the employer could be considered rude.
  • If you are given a deadline to respond to the offer by, ensure you reply within the given time frame or the job might go to somebody else.
  • Weigh up your options. If you’re not feeling too loved up with the first offer and the interview for the other job is within the week, go ahead. However, if the other interview is in three weeks’ time, the chances are your standing offer will go to someone else.
  • It’s all about whether you want to take the risk that other interviews will go well and you’ll be offered a job elsewhere.


Should I be honest about my other job interviews?

At the job interview they might ask if you have any other interviews lined up and there’s not much point in lying. For those of you who are worried the employer will break off relations – remember this is a two-way street.

  • Hiring managers know an amazing candidate has other interviews going on. Don’t be scared to give them a little prod by telling them other companies are interested in you, especially when dealing with a job role you really want.
  • If you’ve been waiting a while for an answer, email or hone the employer or recruiter to let them know you need an answer soon as other companies are interested in you.
  • The interviewer may straight-up ask if you have any other opportunities you’re interested in taking at the moment. Let them know you have other interviews but are still extremely interested in their company.


I accepted a job offer but now I want to withdraw it…  


You should always be 100% sure before accepting any job offers – avoid committing too soon if you’re hesitant. If you think it’s a good idea to accept an offer while waiting to hear back from another role you’d prefer, this probably isn’t a great idea. Breaking up with an employer can be messy – they will have invested time and maybe even money in the recruitment process, so if you do need to withdraw acceptance, do it gently. As long as you haven’t signed an employment contract, you are legally allowed to change your mind. Make sure you -

  • Let the employer know as soon as possible so they can search for your replacement.
  • Express gratitude for the job offer and explain why you have changed your mind tactfully.
  • You never know, you might want to work with the company again in the future so be professional and polite.


You have to ask yourself where you will feel happy, fulfilled and where offers you the company culture and development opportunities you want. If you’re struggling, make a pros and cons list of each job offer and weigh up the place that seems best for you.

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